Don't feel like putting in a DVD, don't feel like sleep. Nothing is on TV. So I'm watching curling.
WHY is this an Olympic "sport"? What is athletic about this? Why are they so serious about it... hollerin'... so intense. DUDE... you're pushing a rock and sweeping. There's a giant target that seems to serve no apparent purpose because from what I can tell they're responding the same no matter where the thing stops. (I've figured out the scoring & the purpose. I still don't think it's a "sport" anymore than carrying in your groceries is a "sport".) And I nit you shot, the announcer just said "this Norway team is trying to push a hot deuce". That's all I need to know. That must be the purpose for the bullseye.
There's truly something magnificent about watching dudes sweeping in argyle pants.
Can you imagine what it must be like for these guys in the Olympic village? I can picture it, lunch time at the Olympian cafeteria. All these athletes who train so intense all their lives for one moment of glory sitting at tables laughing and talking about that one time they blew out (insert appendage or joint of choice) and thought their career was over. ...Back in the far corner, huddled with their Swiffers and Hot Pockets, talking about why Picard was a better captain than Kirk, the curlers. (Picard WAS.)
On the flip side, how pissed off would you be if you were Apolo Ohno strolling through Vancouver with your bronze and along comes a pudgy bald dude with a gold medal? That he got for... assisting in the general sliding direction of a rock.
And while we're at it, if Curling can be a Winter Olympic Game, it is only fair that Cornhole be instated as an official Summer Olympic Game. ...Or Ski-Ball. Or that one game where you put your quarter in and it falls in another pile of quarters, and the shelves push & retract and you always think the quarters will fall. But, the quarters never fall. So you give up and trade in your tickets for spider rings & jolly ranchers. What's next? Olympic Spacing Out In the Middle of Conversations? Olympic Changing the Toilet Paper Roll?
"Oh hey! What'd you get your gold medal for?" ... "Air hockey."
